It Matters Not
by Darragh Tieraneaux
Summary: This is from Maikalinde's pov. It begins five hundred years after Legolas is born. Second edition of the Eight Princes Series. I gues EP was a prologue of sorts **SLASH** Explanation on why Maika's crying in Eight Princes is up!!
1. Introduction

**Introduction**

          I will tell the tale of our story.  The story of how Thalionlass and I came to be, I guess you could say.  How our feelings developed.  

We shared the womb.  We were of the same spirit.  We were born on the same night, in the same room and almost at the same time.  This made us closer than one ever thought possible.  We were two halves of one whole.

          It all started about five hundred years after Legolas was born.

Disclaimer: You know the drill…

A/N: The second in the Eight Princes series.  I hope you like.  Told from Maikalindë's point of view. Anyway, please review.  Thanks for reviewing.  Does this sound good?  Luv Gia. 


	2. Early Morning and The Rising Sun

**Chapter One**

**Early Morning And The Rising Sun**

            I was sleeping, tossing and turning in my bed.  I was having a nightmare of some childish trouble that I forget of what it even was about.  I must have being making a lot of noise, for Thalionlass was at my side in an instant trying to rouse me.  

"Maikalindë!" He said gently shaking my shoulder. 

My eyes flew open and I found myself staring into my brother's eyes.  It was like looking into a mirror, except than Thalionlass's beautiful face was confused while mine was just tired.  

          "What is it?" I asked groggily.  

          "You were tossing and turning," Thalionlass said quietly. 

          "Was I?" I asked dumbly.  He smiled so warmly; I felt the bottom of my stomach drop.

          "You were," he laughed quietly.

          "What time is it?" I asked as I sat up.  He sat down on the side of my bed.

          "Almost four a.m.," he said quietly.  I yawned.  "Still tired?"

          "A bit," I answered quietly.

          "Well, then do not let me stop you from sleeping," he said as he retreated back to his bed.  How I longed for him to sleep next to me, in my arms.  At that point I had banished the thought, thinking myself strange for wanting something like that from my brother. "Sleep tight."

          With that, I heard his breathing slow and deepen.  I knew he was asleep, but I could not.  The thing with me was that if I woke early in the morning, I could not return to a restful sleep.

          So I lay there, thinking of things.  Watching my twin.  Suddenly, he awoke.  I quickly looked to the canopy of my bed.  Then, I acted as if he woke me from my sleep.

          "Thalionlass, what is it?" I asked sitting up, for I heard him grumble something.

          "I can't sleep," he said quietly looking over to where I sat.  "Can you?"

          It appeared my brother had the same problem as I.

          "No, not in the slightest.  What time is it?" I asked.

          "Four twenty," he answered rubbing his eyes.

          "Want to get some breakfast?" I asked quietly as I slipped out of bed.  

          "I do," he said sliding out of his bed.

          Thalionlass walked to the wardrobe and pulled on a pair of leggings.  He did not put a tunic over his undershirt.  'Too hot,' he had muttered.  I did the same thing and we walked quietly toward the kitchens.  

          When we arrived there, it was completely empty.  It was even too early for Iriador.  So, we found some bread and some jam.  We were about to sit down at the table when Thalionlass suggested something.

          "Why don't we take our breakfast outside to the hill in the garden and watch the sunrise?"

          "I would love that!" I had said enthusiastically.

          "Well, let's go then," he said walking toward the door.  

          I followed him quietly.  We walked in silence to the small hill in the garden.  We sat and ate our food in the grey dawn as we awaited the rising sun.  Soon, it had begun to rise and it splashed the world around us in brilliant reds and oranges. All one could do is sit and watch the magnificence unfold.  When the sun had fully risen, in all of its glory, Thalionlass turned to me.

          "The sunrise was almost as beautiful as your-," he stopped short as if he had said too much.  I laughed.  He later told me that he had meant that it was as almost as beautiful as my smile.  

Disclaimer:  Tolkien owns anything that you've heard of.  Anything unknown is mine of course!

A/N:  So, that was chapter #1.  I would suggest, that if you do not care for "twincest" slash, DO NOT read on.  This may be the last update for a while.  I want to get some more chapters put on 'Eight Princes' before I continue, but do not give up hope on this one.  This chapter was more of a prologue than a chapter but I still put it as a chapter.  Anyway, I hope you like it and if you didn't don't flame me please.  Well, thank you for reviewing.  Luv, Gia


	3. First Tears

A/N:  You may NOT want to read this but it is an explanation of why Maika is crying from Eight Princes.  Maika and Thalion have their first 'encounter' before they begin to talk about their relationship.  They believe this is just a small once only indiscretion. Chapter Two 

**First Tears**

          The early hours of the morning began out beautiful enough.  The sun rose, slowly, over the forest.  Then it grew dark and it was about to storm.  No doubt Lossenethir was on the balcony taking it all in.

 I had had another dream and was lying in bed with Thalionlass.  We were quite close and he held my hand.  I know it sounds childish but it couldn't have been more wonderful.  How I had craved to be that close to my twin, but still I felt ashamed to be thinking of my brother that way and embarrassed, thinking, that he didn't feel the same way. We lay there for quite some time.

Then, a particularly loud boom of thunder woke and startled me.  I moved closer to my brother, accidentally pushing my buttocks into his groin.  I felt him jolt awake and then a rising hardness touched me.  My face was aflame with some powerful realisation and the tiniest bit of embarrassment.  I wanted to make sure his reaction wasn't something I dreamed up so I rolled my hips back again.  From this I received a stifled moan.

"Thalionlass?" I inquired. "Are you awake?"

"Aye, I am," was his hoarse reply. 

I turned slowly, to look into his eyes.  I tried not to let my eyes drift to the bulging leggings.  We both stared into our mirror images, neither of us dared to speak.  So, Thalionlass let his actions speak for him.  He captured my lips in a tender kiss but tenderness turned into hungry need as years of pent up passion took over.

I must admit now that I didn't know what I should have. So we kissed.  Thalionlass's hand wound its way down my chest, to its final destination: the burning need between my legs.  It was so right and so wrong.  It took all of my will to reach down and stop him.  He looked into my eyes, questioning my actions.

"This is wrong," I whispered.  He smiled, but concern was in his eyes as he searched for an answer.  After a moment, he replied.

"I could be told a million times that to love kin is wrong, but I love you and nothing has _ever_ felt so right."

His words were so sincere.  I was nearly brought to tears by the sheer honesty that was held in that simple phrase.  But, sincere as they were, I wasn't fully rid of my fears.  

Thalionlass began his ministrations again.  He seemed to enjoy the moans and whimpers he elicited from me.  The shivering of my body meant I was near release.  Then, I found the warm hand was gone from my body.  I tried to protest but my protests came out as exasperated sighs.  He smiled and then kissed me again.

"Would you like me to take you?"  He whispered into my ear, which made me shiver.  I looked at him, wondering what he meant.  I had heard of a male taking a female but never a male taking a male.  

"O.k." I nodded.  He put a hand on my waist and gently turned me onto my stomach.

"Get onto your knees," he instructed gently.

I obeyed slightly nervous.  He caressed me and kissed me.  Then, I felt him run a wet finger over my entrance.  This made me shiver.   I could feel him smile.  He steadied me with shaking hands, whether it was from nervousness or anticipation I could not tell, on my waist.  I then knew what he was going to do.  And it did not scare me.  So, he, slowly, began to push himself into me.  It hurt so much and I couldn't do it.

"Please," I begged. "Stop."

Thalionlass obeyed my plea and pulled out of me.  I climbed to the edge of the bed and quietly and quickly put on some clothes.  I walked to the door.

"I'm sorry," I whispered as tears poured down my cheeks. That was the first time I had ever cried.  Then I opened the door to come face to face with Legolas.  I looked at him for a moment, then I saw Elrohir and I ran from them.  I ran to the only person I knew would understand.  The only person, other than Thalionlass, I could talk to.  I got to the door and I pounded on it with my fists.  My brother opened the door.

"Maika?" He inquired. "What's wrong?"

"Lossenethir," was the only thing I said before I broke into sobs.   He brought me gently into the room.  My knees buckled and he caught me.  We both sank to the floor.  

"We…" I sobbed. "We started to make l-love and I couldn't and I've hurt him and I cannot bear that.  Lossenethir, what am I going to do?  I cannot live without him…  I feel so strange and almost tormented by guilt and I am ashamed."

"It's o.k.  Of course you feel ashamed.  You have been told, all of us have, that it's wrong to love kin…  but you love him and nothing or no one can deny love.  You did as your heart dictated and you will again."

"But I don't know what to do," I sobbed.  He opened his mouth to answer but was cut off by a knock on the door.  We both just looked at it.  

"It's me, Legolas," my youngest brother whispered.

"I cannot face anyone right now," I said with a pleading look in my eyes.

"But he only wants to know how you fare," Lossenethir pointed out.  In the end I gave in.  "Come in."

My youngest brother entered the room wrapped in his untouched innocence.  Concern was written on his delicate features.  He looked like he wanted to know what happened to make me so upset, but how could he understand?  How could he _possibly_ understand?

Disclaimer:  Tolkien owns Mirkwood and Legolas… I own anything unknown…

A/N:  Well, that was the explanation…  It may have been a bit graphic for some of you, but it is why he was crying in 'Eight Princes'.  So, if you didn't like it don't flame me because if I get flamed I can't write because it rests on my mind.  Like I said before this isn't for everyone.  Anyway, I gotta go… So review please.  Thanks for reading, Luv Gia. 


	4. The Day After

A/n: Hope ya like… 

**Chapter Three**

**The Day After**

            It was still quite early in the morning and I had taken refuge in Mirkwood.  Near a small pond that wasn't close to the edge of the forest, nor was it so deep to be threatened by the spiders and I sat there staring at my reflection in disgust.  I could not face Thalion; I actually slept in the forest just to avoid him.  Lossenethir covered for me.  I told him I had to be alone for a while.  

          I listened to the birds chirp sweetly; listened to the water as I ran my finger across the surface.  I lay down on my back and watched the sky through holes in the canopy.  I made myself clear my mind and think of nothing but there and then.  No Thalion, no forbidden love just me lying in the grass by a pond.  

          That soon proved to be unsuccessful as my mind began to wander.  I began to think about Thalion and our life together over the years.  You know, about how it was just us as brothers not anything else.  He was my partner in crime, or was it that I was his partner in crime?  I loved our pranks, especially the ones we pulled on Celebiathion.  He always had the best reactions to them.  

          Then Thalion's eyes found their way into my mind.  I always loved his eyes.  Everyone thinks they are the mirror image of my own, but they are not.  His are so much more passionate than my own.  He always said my eyes were gentle and caring.  His eyes were always filled with a mischievous glint, passion about something, arrogance or defiance and sometimes there was a mixture of them, but that was toward everyone else.  I would receive the beautifully serene, loving look he reserved for only me.

          Only me…  That made me think about all the times he looked at me.  All the times I thought were looks of brotherly adoration and nothing more, all the times I would scold myself for wanting something more from those looks, they were for me, only me and that there was something meant by it.  

          Then that brought me back to my dilemma.  _It is wrong to love kin, especially your brother, _I thought sadly, _but how can something that feels so right be so wrong?_

          I stared at the sky as tears began to form in my eyes for a second time in the past twenty-four hours.  Everything was so complicated.  Everything was so unfair.  If only I could change the world, if only I could be normal.  _But I'm not normal! _I thought angrily.  I started venting my rage by shouting about everything I thought was unfair.  Then, for some strange reason, I dozed off.

*        *         *

          I slowly came to consciousness and I suddenly became aware that I couldn't feel the sun on my face.  I was too far away from my sword to do anything too substantial to whatever was there, yes I knew something was the because I could hear the soft breath of whatever it was.  I was afraid to move, even open my eyes but I thought I had to do it sometime.  I slowly opened my eyes and looked into the smiling but still troubled eyes of my brother.

          "Thalion!" I said quickly as I sat up nearly whipping him with my hair.

          "Maikalindë!" He said as he sat back on his knees.

          "What are you doing here?" I asked quietly lowering my gaze from his eyes. 

          "I was worried when I couldn't find you yesterday.  I asked Lossenethir and he said that you were in the forest," he said simply and I nodded looking slightly absent minded.  _Oh Lossenethir how could you? _I thought slightly angry.  I didn't know what to say to him.   Really, what could I have said?

          We sat in very awkward silence for quite some time.  Finally, Thalion spoke.  

          "We're going camping tomorrow," he said quietly.  That came from out of nowhere, but that's what he probably came to tell me.  

          "Thalion, listen… We need-," I started.

          "I know.  Maika, I don't know how you feel.  Lossenethir said I should give you space for a little while. I gave you all night and I was going to give you today and tomorrow, but every moment I'm away from you I feel like I am missing half of myself.  I cannot be away from you for long because it is agony.  I know I don't know how you feel, but I know how I feel and I love you.  It doesn't matter that we're brothers.  At least not to me.  Sure, it'll bother other people and I don't know how our brothers will take it and-," Thalion said quickly and was about to keep going.  My heart soared at what he was suggesting. 

          "Thalion?"

          "If you don't want to I completely understand-," He just kept going.

          "Thalion?"

          "Hmm?  Yeah?"

          "You're babbling," I pointed out quietly.  He smiled.

Disclaimer:  Tolkien owns anything Recognised… I own anything else.

A/N:  O.k.  I know this may have happened a little quicker than one might have liked but oh well…  Well tell me what ya think… That's all for now… Thanks for reading and reviewing… Thanks again, Luv Gia


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